If it weren’t so disastrous, it would be a comedy classic.
The day of the great stock sell-off was like one particularly side-splitting scene in the movie “Airplane”:
“Flight 209 now arriving at Gate 8 . . .”
“Gate 9.” “Gate 10.” “Gate 13.” “Gate 15. . .”
The Associated Press’s headline April 3 around noon: “Dow drops 1,200 points as tariffs cause COVID-like shock.”
Then “drops 1,300 points.” Then “drops 1,400.” Then “drops 1,600.”
Two days later, Dow had lost over 2,200 points. The S&P 500 index had lost 14 percent of its value. In mere moments, we have gone from a thriving economy to one a few steps away from stock traders face-planting on pavement.
All because of one man.
Economist Scott Galloway called it the result of a “blackout drunk at the wheel of the global economy.”
That’s harsh to describe a guy who has his own plane.
“Captain Clueless here. We are minutes away from prosperity the likes of which you’ve never seen. Reports of turbulence on this flight are fake news. I hope you enjoyed in-flight entertainment courtesy of Fox News.”
How miscalculating could one man be? Pretty much off his rudder.
He inherited a very sound economy – job growth, manufacturing growth, pandemic-induced inflation greatly moderated. His formula for addressing all this: Let’s drive up prices and dynamite every trade relationship we’ve ever had.
Joe Biden did more for domestic manufacturing – semiconductors, clean energy, automobiles – than any president since FDR. And FDR’s economy was pumping up a war effort.
Now, Biden’s successor wants a war he can’t win, one unlikely to result in new jobs before he is cast out into history’s unforgiving gales.
A key “problem” working against tariffs as a U.S. manufacturing elixir is that Joe Biden left us with damn near full employment – the best job figures in decades.
Remember the Haitians in Springfield, Ohio? The dark-skinned victims of a damnable racist canard? They weren’t eating pets. What they were doing en masse was filling job openings at plants and distribution centers like Amazon’s which were desperate for workers, since the natives weren’t applying.
Go ahead and criminalize immigration, MAGA. Clueless’s crackdown on immigrants will cut many employers off at the knees and thereby add to the trade deficit.
Put labor aside and know that the biggest reason tariffs won’t boost America’s economy is the uncertainty underpinning them.
No one is going to build a factory without a sound handle on the future of international trade, not to mention stability in the cost of labor and materials.
Betting on an erratic man in the White House is the worst wager a domestic manufacturer can make. Overseas competitors are going to wait him out. They have no real reason to negotiate with him. Anyway, who knows what he will do next week?
Harvard economist Jason Furman says the biggest problem with this whole situation may be the uncertainty wrought by an erratic individual in control. Uncertainty stops investment cold.
The sleep-deprived megalomaniac at the controls is the embodiment of uncertainty.
Meanwhile, as news outlets now report with remarkable gusto — the same ones that let Candidate Clueless lie unchallenged — tariffs aren’t paid by trade partners. They are a tax on you and me, on consumption. And even with the “pause,” they are the highest tariffs in 100 years.
Seventy-seven percent of toys are made in China. Expect wool socks for Christmas, little ones.
Hell, we’re seeing the cost of eggs rise further. Is that even possible?
Uncertainty? One thing you can count on, without a doubt, is that the Captain will be busy self-dealing — a non-stop shakedown of any industries and global competitors that come begging for relief.
“Captain Clueless here. We’re cleared for rapid descent to the best jobs, the biggest paychecks, the brightest economic future the world has ever seen.
“Disregard the seat belt sign. Feel free to walk around the cabin. Forget that stuff about trays and seat backs. Carry-ons? Everyone for himself. Thanks for flying MAGA Air.
“Somewhere here is the ‘land plane’ button.”
Longtime newspaperman John Young lives in Colorado. Email: jyoungcolumn@gmail.com.
